So, as of this past Monday my oldest daughter began taking some anti-depressant medication as prescribed by her primary care physician. I'm still not entirely sure how I feel about it, but I know it really is the only option we have at this point. I mean, who wants to say that their daughter is on anti-depressants? It pains me to see her not fully experiencing her teenage years, and making so many poor decisions that could effect her future. Thinking back on my high school years (which were actually quite enjoyable), I know what she is missing out on by not being more socially active. With all that she has been through, I suppose we are getting off easy with only some minor acting out up to this point, but sometimes I see things churning beneath the surface. Things that worry me. Will she be equipped to be on her own when she's done with high school? Will she make it out of high school without ending up pregnant? Will she make it at all? I don't want her to be lost. I see so many other kids that are just...lost. I can only trust that we are doing everything we can to prepare her and that somehow it will come to the forefront when she needs it.
We didn't arrive at the option of medication quickly, but with the exhausted psychological care benefits we have we really didn't have much of a choice. I sat down with her a couple of weeks ago to discuss this option and told her it would be her choice as to whether or not she gave it a try. Luckily, she agreed, and so we are starting off with a low, 10mg prescription for generic Prozac. We went over all of the potential side effectsThe doctor said it would take about three to four weeks to build up in her system and to come back at that time for a checkup. Maybe I'm overly optimistic, but I want to say she's been more upbeat lately. Maybe I'm just fooling myself. I don't know. But I know that I love her, I want her to be happy and I want her to smile more.
Now comes the hard part: explaining this to her mom.
