I am become death, destroyer of blogs

So, what the hell people? For some reason, the readership on this blog has dropped down to me and some unemployed surfer in Thailand. What did I do people? Did I sleep with your wife? Husband? Did I call your kid a nasty name? They totally deserved it, truth be told. That kid’s an asshole.

Am I not entertaining enough for you? Do I need to jump off of another roof to prove my love for you? FINE. If that’s what you want, that’s what you’ll get. Well, I’ll hopefully be hooking up (not like that, you nasty) with blogger and where movie references go to die, Prisco, and hopefully a couple of the big muck-a-mucks from Pajiba in a couple of weeks after they’ve spent the day dressed as Wonder Woman and Bat Girl at the Comic Con in San Diego.

With any luck, I’ll be able to get some incriminating photos of them that I can parley into some cold hard cash. But it’s all in the name of good fun. And web traffic. Because I am an attention whore.

Editor's note: I will also be meeting up with the lovely and oh so talented Girl with Curious Hair of the blog by the same name andBlog Me a Tale.

It's raining Puerto Ricans
by mannmartinez

Makes me wanna sing

With the permission of the Bunkum Brothers I'm posting lyrics to a song of theirs that I find particularly fitting these days in light of recent events that have stirred our fine media into a frenzy.....and cuz I wanna drive some goddamn traffic my way. Without further delay, the lyrics to "Dear Lindsay Lohan" by the Bunkem Brothers.

Dear Lindsay Lohan

(m. carter)

Lindsay Lohan, where do you think you're goin' now?
You drink and you dance, you got ants in your pants so I'm told
But I'm afraid to say that, honey, someday you'll grow old

Paris Hilton, have you ever read John Milton, girl?
He wrote Paradise Lost in which Satan gets tossed down to Hell
And it occurs to me that it's a story you know well

Twins of Olsen, you were such sweet and wholesome girls
You succeeded so young, living two lives in one, now you've grown
But if you do the math that means you're older than Sharon Stone

Ashlee Simpson, don't come undone my friend
Sure your sister is hot and we all know you're not so you're blue
But the sands of time will make her ugly just like you

Lindsay Lohan, sweetie, what do you think you're showin' us?
With a click and a flash they always cause you to crash, what a world
But someday soon they'll be chasing a younger girl

Lindsay, baby, you know you're gonna get old

Feel free to stop by their site, where you can actually hear each of the songs on their new CD "Love Songs", including my personal favorite, "Excuse Me Miss".