Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Jesus had kung fu action grip?



Squeezable saints
Appalled by today's role models, Teri O'Toole makes religiously themed toys that "set an example"
By GWENDOLYN DRISCOLL
The Orange County Register

Get yours today! Available while supplies last! Order now!

You don't wanna be the only one without your Jesus plush doll when your savior comes a-callin'! You can't prove your faith without it! Is he God made flesh or the Son of God? Who cares when you can defeat all the forces of COBRA with just one Jesus doll!

Your Jesus doll comes complete with the following:

Kung Fu grip for beating the crap out of non-believers!
Inflatable sandals to keep his feet dry for those long walks ON the water!
Saintly aura! (Batteries not included)
Red dye for turning water into wine! (kids, ask your parents permission before turning water into wine)
Hidden compartments for storing extra fish and loaves of bread!

Coming soon!

Emo Jesus
Stylin' Mary Magdalen
Super Spy Judas

7 comments:

TK said...

I already have them all. As well as the Robo-Apostle collection and the New Whip-It-Good Jesus, complete with crown of thorns and blood.

'Cause t'aint nobody loves Jesus like I love Jesus.

NOBODY.

slouchmonkey said...

"Wooden Jesus, where are you from?
Korea, Canada, maybe Taiwan?"

Manny said...

I'll trade you my Crazy Hair Pontius Pilate and my Gundam Jesus with beam sabre for your Robo-Apostles, TK.

Tisha! said...

where's my zombie lazarus!?

Anonymous said...

WOW! Never have I seen such a lack of respect! Your comments and those of others seem to only feed the lack of religious tolerance we see in our society today. It is difficult for me to understand how one can make such stupid statements regarding another's efforts to create positive role models. I did some research on this company and its designer/founder and wow, I am impressed! Not only is this organization a non profit endeavor, but they also give many, many dolls away FREE to hospice patients, children and the elderly. I for one am going to contact them and thank them for their efforts. I noticed that you must approve all comments, thus I am confident that this comment will never appear on your blog. Not sure I will visit again, as you seem to disrespect almost everything. Was I surprised to read that you in fact have custody of your daughters. WOW......funny where following a link can land someone :-(

Manny said...

Anonymous-sorry for the delay in posting your comment. I'll generally post any comment that isn't from a bot or someone just stupid. In regards to your comment about "religious tolerance", let me clear something up for you. I am, in fact, tolerant of all religions up until a point. That point being when any religion has to demonize or condemn another religion sexuality, or lifestyle in order to validate it's own doctrine. IF and when Jesus was preaching to his followers, I'm pretty sure he didn't think "Gee, I really hope they capture my likeness when my line of plush dolls comes out". And yes, I do have custody of my two daughters. Since when did religion have a monopoly on morality? I know some atheists that are fantastic parents & some wretched human beings that were "saved" Christians. Funny where following a mythological figure can land someone... :)

Manny said...

Anonymous-sorry for the delay in posting your comment. I'll generally post any comment that isn't from a bot or someone just stupid. In regards to your comment about "religious tolerance", let me clear something up for you. I am, in fact, tolerant of all religions up until a point. That point being when any religion has to demonize or condemn another religion sexuality, or lifestyle in order to validate it's own doctrine. IF and when Jesus was preaching to his followers, I'm pretty sure he didn't think "Gee, I really hope they capture my likeness when my line of plush dolls comes out". And yes, I do have custody of my two daughters. Since when did religion have a monopoly on morality? I know some atheists that are fantastic parents & some wretched human beings that were "saved" Christians. Funny where following a mythological figure can land someone... :)